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Monday, May 17, 2010

Kevin and the Bullies...

Are you enjoying the blog inundation? Well, get ready to quench your thirst because there's still more posts coming your way. This post was written during my lunch hour on my 2nd week of school. Of note: I'm still avoiding "sex geek" friendship like the plague. ;-)

A few weeks ago (actually 4/7/10) John witnessed Kevin getting in trouble for straying away from the group at Park & Rec. The director noticed that Kevin would wander off on his own and hide by the stairs while the rest of the kids played on the blacktop. Straying from the group is pretty dangerous. Being unsupervised could potentially make my first born son more vulnerable if a predator with a fetish for adorable-little-boys-with-dimples were to unexpectedly come on campus.

Then I'd be forced to blow someones head off. So, really? Nobody wins.

Apparently, the director (Mr. C) spoke Kevin about this inherent danger before, but often times he still continued to be a repeat offender. So, when John saw Kev getting in trouble it was because he was reprimanded so many times before. Now, whenever my boy gets in trouble it's "classic Kevin" to clam up. Kev stays quiet out of fear, not defiance. And for some reason the KID never says what the real problem is.

He's sooooo his father's son.

Mr. C is about my height, but with his booming voice and tattoos I imagine he's a pretty intimidating to the Park & Rec kids. I think I could take him. (Lol...I'm TOTALLY kidding of course. He's a really nice guy and I would die if he ever found this blog entry.) But I digress...Mr. C was unsuccessfully trying to get to the root of the problem. He let John know about the issue and asked him to do some investigative work of our own.

John tried to talk to Kev in the car, but he still didn't say a word.

I foresee that John and Kev may have some issues in the future because their communication styles are so alike. Those two tend to deal with their issues internally and you have to be really persistent to figure out what's bugging them. John called me out of exasperation because I suppose they were both being "clammy".

I was at the cemetery tending to Ethan's headstone when my phone rang. At first he was quiet, but after a lot of coercing and questioning, poor Kevin finally broke down and cried. When Kevin's sense of machismo sets in he'll probably hate me for writing this story for all the internet to see. (To that I say, "It's MY blog Future Kevin, so sue me!") Anyway, in between hysteric sobs he somehow managed to tell me that two older boys (a 4th and 5th grader) had been tormenting him for a few weeks. Kevin is a lover, not a fighter and in that retrospect he's my son. Kevin strayed from the pack so he could use the stairs to "hide" from the bullies. Apparently, the older boys were hitting him the face and stomach AND calling him a "bitch" and an "idiot" from time to time. He didn't want to do anything because they were bigger.

Mother. F*ckers.

I conjured up my inner gangster and vowed mafia-style that I would avenge the disrespect that was bestowed upon my first born son. Okay...I didn't do that, but it would have totally cool if I did, huh? No, what I actually did was explain to him that he was just too cool for a 1st grader and that the older boys were just being dumb. I also gave him an anecdotal story about my elementary school bullies (those f*ckers said I had AIDS because I had eczema) and told him to ask his Daddy about what he did about bullies when he was a kid. (I assumed that John would have the fatherly talk about whoopin' ass once we got off the phone.) I also reminded Kev that he was lion and lions roar to reclaim their pride.

Slowly, but surely I stacked up his "confidence blocks" and told him that I'd do my best to make sure that those little shits wouldn't ever knock them down again.

My first instinct was to go to Kevin's school to shake the sh*t out of those little boys for messing with my baby. But the "lover" in me decided that I better not in case I get knocked out by the opposing child's parents. I think we all know it's not a good look to get your ass beat in front of your kid. Later that night, John and I had a "cub conference" and decided that I would talk to Mr. C about what our investigation turned up. (We also discussed the possibility of enrolling Kev in karate when Boo was old enough to be in the same class. So, maybe next year?) The following day, I asked to get off 15 minutes early so I could play a sneak attack on the bullies. I couldn't shake 'em, but there was no harm in giving them the "scary mom stare" before I talked to Mr. C. ;-)

My manager approved my time off and told me in her
British accent to "go slap 'em". Lol!

Kevin was very concerned about being a tattletale and a dork. He didn't want to me to talk to Mr. C, but I reminded him that I'm a "cool mom" so it's impossible for me to have "dorky" kids. He looked a little hesitant, but seemed to understand that I was going to do what I needed to do. Lol...I still can't believe he *thinks* I'm not cool enough for him. Especially because he was wearing this (with a straight face) when I picked him up from school the day of my meeting with Dr. C:

They're "x-ray glasses" that he won for participating
in the school's candy sale. Lol, I swear I wonder about this kid sometimes...

I didn't get to see the bullies that day, but I had a talk with Mr. C and found out that those two particular kids had been a problem for quite some time. In fact, Mr. C even had to set up a conference with one of the kids' parents because he was getting so out of hand. They were bullying a lot of the younger kids. I was relieved that Kevin wasn't being solely targeted. After informing Mr. C about Kevin's concern with being a tattletale, his solution was to pull Kevin from the blacktop and have him hang out in the gym during "blacktop time". I didn't agree with that compromise because I felt that it was teaching Kevin to run away from his problems. I opted to have Kevin make the decision to stay in the gym on a daily basis instead. We (Mr. C, myself, and Kev) were okay with Kevin being the master of his own universe. Kevin agreed to never stray from the pack again.

That still didn't seem like it was enough though. I decided that I would give Kevin a good luck charm so he would always remember his confidence. I improvised and ripped this off of my Simba pen at work. When I gave it to Kevin I explained to him that he should keep it in his pocket. I didn't tell him that it had magical powers, but I told him that it will help him remember that he's a lion whenever he felt too afraid to stick up for himself.

And I said, "And what do lions do when they get mad?"
Kevin shouted, "They roar!!!!

The Lion Charm

Kevin hasn't had any stories about the bullies ever since. Also, it looks like I've got a budding author on my hands. Diary of a Wimpy Kid by Jeff Kinney inspired him to start keeping diary *ahem* journal. So, anytime I need to get dirt on his little life, I can totally violate his privacy and read his journal. (Sorry, Future Kevin. Desperate times call for desperate measures.)

P.S. I finally saw the bullies a few days after my meeting with Mr. C. It's no wonder the were messing with the younger kids. The may have been "upperclassmen", but they were the smallest in their respective peer groups. Perhaps they took the saying "pick on someone your own size" a little too seriously. I totally gave them the "scary mom stare" anyway. ;-)

-- Posted From My iPhone using BlogPress

1 comment:

  1. wth! i can't believe kids these days. i mean there were kids that were a little on the bully side but i don't remember anyone punching anyone in the face/stomach unless it as a full on fight. anyway, as always, you kept a level head and did the right thing. you are such a good mom!